Revenge is a Dish Best Served Cold
by IamFortunata
Summary: Kurt discovers a video that entertains him more than it should. Warnings for slight blackmail and light cursing, but generally, this one's tame.


Kurt was bored. Blaine was taking his sweet time in his en suite bathroom, and Kurt was painfully bored. He needed to do something lest he lose his mind in the next few minutes just waiting for his boyfriend to finish dressing up. He had offered his help since Blaine still had the eye-patch from when Sebastian Smythe threw a large tumbler of rock salt-laced slushie on his beautiful face. Kurt still seethed whenever he remembered how much pain Blaine had been in after that epic fail of a sing-off between New Direction and the Warblers.

Kurt spotted Blaine's laptop on his study table and quirked an eyebrow. "Blaine, baby?" he called out. He heard a soft acknowledgement coming from the closed door of his boyfriend's bathroom. "Can I borrow your laptop? I swear I'm not going to go through your browser history!"

"Kurt, you won't be able to see anything incriminating even if you go through that darn thing with a fine-toothed comb anyway, so be my guest!" was Blaine's muffled reply.

Kurt shouted his thanks as he walked over to the desk to grab the laptop after shouting his thanks over the sound of the now running water from the bathroom. Kurt stopped in his tracks going back to Blaine's bed and blinked at the door, as if expecting it to reply. "Seriously? You chose to take a shower _now_?"

"It's not like we can do anything other than chat and relax anyway, Kurt. My eye still stings and I'm still on painkillers!" Blaine retorted.

Kurt huffed and murmured _whatever_ under his breath. He settled down comfortably back on the bed and turned Blaine's laptop on.

After a few minutes of browsing mindlessly from one Broadway play website to another, Kurt decided to go on YouTube to watch Idina Menzel's performance of Defying Gravity for the umpteenth time. After a couple of minutes, he got bored once again and decided to search for videos of Shenandoah's Next to Lovin'. Kurt will never admit it to anyone, even to Blaine, that Shenandoah was one of his guilty pleasures regardless if he thinks it was a poor excuse for a play.

He went through video after video until one caught his attention. The thumbnail just showed a picture of a bunch of guys wearing black in a straight line. Interest piqued, Kurt clicked on the link that just mentioned the name of the high school the video was taken in and the song's title. He made sure that it was on full screen and started watching.

The video's quality wasn't very good, but he could still somewhat make out the faces of each of the performers. It started out quite entertainingly so Kurt settled on the bed more comfortably as he continued watching the video. The first few seconds of the video had him chuckling lightly, but when a familiar face suddenly popped upstage from the background, all flamboyant and..._Jesus Christ_…all flamboyant and squeaky, Kurt's jaw dropped. His eyes widened at every frame, forgetting to laugh no matter how hilarious the entire video was. There, in all his flamboyantly gay, shimmying glory, was Sebastian Smythe, prancing around on stage and swinging his hips like his life depended on it. When the video was over, he immediately replayed it, eyes still wide in shock, hand covering his mouth.

"Kurt?" he heard Blaine call his name. He immediately waved his boyfriend to him, his eyes not leaving the computer screen in front of him.

"What's got you so glued to that screen?" Blaine asked, curiosity lacing his voice. Kurt pointed at the screen and Blaine's gaze followed it. Kurt turned to watch Blaine's own jaw dropped.

"Kurt…I…this…"

Kurt returned his gaze to the computer screen and continued watching, a wide, maniacal grin on his lips. "I know."

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Sebastian Smythe just wanted a quiet afternoon alone at the Lima Bean that day. After the Michael Jackson fiasco and his co-Warblers turning against him after what he did to Blaine, he just wanted to be left to his own devices for once instead of having to deal with Jeff's and Trent's judging looks and Nick's never-ending plea for him to talk to his best friend (Nick was Sebastian's self-proclaimed best friend in the whole wide world) about what happened, claiming that it'll help Sebastian make heads and tails of everything and eventually be able to apologize to Kurt and Blaine.

Like he would ever apologize to that gay-faced bitch. Sure, he realized that what he did to Blaine was way out of line, but what's done was done. Besides, Sebastian Smythe never apologizes, not even to his own mother and father.

So when he saw Kurt walking purposefully towards him in the coffee shop, he stifled a groan. He watched as the pale boy stood in front of him, iPad in hand and a smirk on his smug (_smug?_) face.

"And to what do I owe the displeasure of being graced by your presence, Princess?" Sebastian said by way of greeting.

Sebastian frowned as he watched Kurt's smirk turned into a smug grin (_why the hell does gay-face look so smug?_). He placed the iPad in front of the other boy and touched the play button before Sebastian could even register what it was. His eyes followed Kurt's finger and they widened in horror as he watched an old high school video that he and his old show choir teammates made during one of their practice sessions. He cursed under his breath, swearing to inflict every imaginable physical pain on whoever posted the video on YouTube. Sebastian never wanted for this video to get out.

He continued watching in horror as his video self danced, shimmied, and flamboyantly paraded himself to a cheering crowd. He still can't believe how he could have shown so much gay in merely three minutes when he had always passed as straight without even trying.

"I guess it's your inner diva at work," Kurt whispered as if reading his mind. The other boy made himself comfortable on the chair in front of a still aghast Sebastian. "Funny how you could ham it up so well in front of a camera and _still_ manage to call me gay-face." Sebastian remained silent, his face still a mask of pure horror. "Have to admit, though, you boys were quite the talented bunch. I couldn't stop laughing while I watched that thing. Especially when you squeaked when they carried you downstage."

Sebastian still remained silently rooted in his seat. He could barely register everything that Kurt was telling him.

"Here's what's going to happen, Sebastian. You will leave me, Blaine, and the rest of New Direction alone and just compete _fairly_ against us at Regionals. No more bullying, or blackmailing, or anything even remotely vile, or this video gets on Facebook before you can even say Idina. Are we clear?"

Sebastian merely nodded mutely, his eyes still riveted in the video that was playing on loop in front of him. He didn't catch the self-satisfied grin widening on Kurt's face some more. He didn't see Kurt stand and move to his side, leaning close to whisper in his ear.

"See, Sebastian, had you found my _flamboyance_ normal and inoffensive, this video you're watching right now wouldn't even be such a big deal. But _you're_ making it a big deal." Kurt straightened up and walked in front of the taller boy once again. "It was a real pleasure, Sebastian. I hope I never see your face again." And with that, Kurt left, leaving the iPad with Sebastian like some sort of new torture device.

Sebastian never noticed that he was once again alone in the Lima Bean because all he was focused on is his face, his dancing, and the words _oh god_ that kept running through his head.


End file.
